Forums-> Off-Topic-> A bit of election day humor:
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Optimusv2

Optimusv2
Since 1109 Days

2008-11-04 19:05:24 A bit of election day humor

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

'Welcome to heaven,' says St. Peter. 'Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, so we're not sure what to do with you.'

'No problem, just let me in,' says the senator.

'Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.'

'Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,' says the senator.

'I'm sorry, but we have our rules.' and with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people.

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises ...

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.

'Now it's time to visit heaven.'

So, 24 hours pass, with the senator joining a group of contented souls, moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, 24 hours has gone by and St. Peter returns.

'Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.'

The senator reflects for a minute, then answers: 'Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.'

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

The doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above...

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. 'I don't understand,' stammers the senator. 'Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?'

The devil looks at him, smiles and says.......

'Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted.

---
Hironobu Sakaguchi is coming back to reclaim the throne :)

Seeing it in motion on your HDTV, will blow your mind!!

Don't ask any questions just shut up and buy Halo : Ghosts of the Onyx one of the greatest books ever.

pssh! more like electronic g

Phaethon360

Mr Pantsies Phaethon360 - Mr Pant<s>s</s>ies
Since 1062 Days

2008-11-04 19:32:42

You really only need to read the last few lines to get how unfunny that joke was.

---
Don't you know who I am? I'm the goddamned Banman.

FireWire
This message is in "Boulet Time" (TM), If you still *really* want to see it, click here

FireWire

IEEE 1394 FireWire - IEEE 1394
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-04 19:55:17

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cen37qxA7E

---
"Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing. "

GriftGFX

He can also
ban your ass!
GriftGFX - He can also<br>ban your ass!
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-04 21:05:32

The Alfred E. Smith video is funny, that joke... isn't.

FireWire

IEEE 1394 FireWire - IEEE 1394
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-04 22:47:49

As always humor is subjective...

---
"Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing. "

Phaethon360

Mr Pantsies Phaethon360 - Mr Pant<s>s</s>ies
Since 1062 Days

2008-11-05 00:58:07

Yea, the death of a politician is hilarious...

---
Don't you know who I am? I'm the goddamned Banman.

GriftGFX

He can also
ban your ass!
GriftGFX - He can also<br>ban your ass!
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 01:01:49 In reply to FireWire (2008-11-04 22:47:49)

Posted by FireWire
As always humor is subjective...
Nope, that's simply tasteless and not the least be amusing.
Posted by Phaethon360
Yea, the death of a politician is hilarious...
Murder, hate crimes, and civil unrest are all very funny subjects!

Phaethon360

Mr Pantsies Phaethon360 - Mr Pant<s>s</s>ies
Since 1062 Days

2008-11-05 01:43:43

---
Don't you know who I am? I'm the goddamned Banman.

FireWire

IEEE 1394 FireWire - IEEE 1394
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 10:57:44 In reply to GriftGFX (2008-11-05 01:01:49)

I just think you should be able to make a joke about everything... It doesn't mean everyone should like it. But it's one of those things that defines freedom of speech...
I enjoy that kind of dark humor...

When we aren't allowed to mock something, we're getting too close to censorship.

---
"Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing. "

GriftGFX

He can also
ban your ass!
GriftGFX - He can also<br>ban your ass!
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 18:11:48

Sure, you CAN say anything, it doesn't make it right.. or the least bit funny. That's not dark humor, because, ya know.. that would imply that it was a joke. Jokes are funny, that's not funny, that's just fucking stupid.

FireWire

IEEE 1394 FireWire - IEEE 1394
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 19:11:56 In reply to GriftGFX (2008-11-05 18:11:48)

Posted by GriftGFX
Sure, you CAN say anything, it doesn't make it right.. or the least bit funny. That's not dark humor, because, ya know.. that would imply that it was a joke. Jokes are funny, that's not funny, that's just fucking stupid.
Just because you can't laugh about it doesn't mean it is "fucking stupid"

---
"Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing. "

GriftGFX

He can also
ban your ass!
GriftGFX - He can also<br>ban your ass!
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 19:19:47 In reply to FireWire (2008-11-05 19:11:56)

Yea, that's certainly not what makes it so fucking stupid.

Heywood

Heywood
Since 180 Days

2008-11-05 19:46:35 In reply to FireWire (2008-11-05 19:11:56)

Posted by FireWire
Just because you can't laugh about it doesn't mean it is "fucking stupid"
No...its fucking stupid beacuse it is, as you said yourself, inappropriate. There is absolutely nothing funny about the murder of beloved politicians. If you can find humor in that, then I'm sorry, but thats just retarded.

FireWire

IEEE 1394 FireWire - IEEE 1394
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 20:52:08

So because it's inappropriate it's not done? I mean in all seriousness I really think Obama is a great choice and I'm glad he got elected.
And I have to be honest I think that assassination is a real issue here.

But because something is inappropriate does not make it "non-mockable". Hell every issue should IMO be joked about, doesn't matter how inappropriate or serious.

It's in no way meant as an offensive or personal attack. But IMO jokes can lighten the mood how inappropriate they may seem. Hell, I think a lot of people back here the Netherlands enjoy these kind of jokes.
But seeing from your reactions, I will leave these kind of jokes off this forum.

---
"Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing. "

GriftGFX

He can also
ban your ass!
GriftGFX - He can also<br>ban your ass!
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 21:26:56

And I have to be honest I think that assassination is a real issue here.
Wow, you already know why it's not funny! I'm impressed!

It's not funny. Maybe you lack perspective here not being from the US yourself, but there's no humor in assassination. The implications of such actions defy all humor. It's just not in the least bit funny dude. I'm glad you have such a poor sense of humor that you can crack a smile at something so profoundly crass, but I'm sorry.. it's just sad and ignorant and, yes, fucking stupid.

It's about a hundred times worse than the most racist, n-bomb dropping "humor", it's just not in the least bit amusing. It's about as funny as joking about lynchings, or jokingly suggesting that someone should (or will) die because of their sexual preference, nationality, religion, or race. I'm sure there are plenty of redneck idiots who would think it's fucking hilarious though.

You knew it was offensive when you put it on the table, and you're shocked that you offended anyone. That's pretty slick, FireWire.

(Note: no offense to the intelligent, well rounded redneck is implied--I know you're out there, you're family!)

blmbox

blmbox
Since 548 Days

2008-11-05 21:31:37

GriftGFX

He can also
ban your ass!
GriftGFX - He can also<br>ban your ass!
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 21:32:39

That picture gets me every time.

blmbox

blmbox
Since 548 Days

2008-11-05 21:33:49

The funniest thing is that McCain's arms don't go any higher than that.

FireWire

IEEE 1394 FireWire - IEEE 1394
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 21:46:45 In reply to GriftGFX (2008-11-05 21:26:56)

Posted by GriftGFX
You knew it was offensive when you put it on the table, and you're shocked that you offended anyone. That's pretty slick, FireWire.
Well people are easily offended today, and I don't think that's a reason not to make a joke. But don't ever think I made this joke because out of racism or hatred for other people.

I'm well aware Obama is a target because he is black. But because something is a sensitive issue, it shouldn't be named? It shouldn't be joked about? I don't think so!

Again: I'm in no way a racist or hater. And of course assassination is a serious issue. I didn't make this joke to imply he SHOULD be shot. It's after all a joke. And in bad taste it seems.

---
"Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing. "

Jato

Jato
Since 1094 Days

2008-11-05 22:27:34

Inappropriate? Yes. Funny? No.

Big deal? Only if you're an over-sensitive American I guess. Seriously, big deal...

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http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=JatoNL

http://www.myspace.com/jatonl

LEBATO

IS WRONG LEBATO - IS WRONG
Since 1339 Days

2008-11-05 23:55:23 In reply to blmbox (2008-11-05 21:33:49)

Posted by blmbox
The funniest thing is that McCain's arms don't go any higher than that.
lol, indeed, I've been joking about it for a long time :D

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Mods, stop changing my SIG! I'm going to end up banning you!

GriftGFX

He can also
ban your ass!
GriftGFX - He can also<br>ban your ass!
Since 1217 Days

2008-11-05 23:56:24 In reply to LEBATO (2008-11-05 23:55:23)

Posted by LEBATO
lol, indeed, I've been joking about it for a long time :D
Yeah, but we've known that you're not funny for a long time too.

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